Thursday Outside Port Office

Having had a drunken epiphany while getting dressed, he figures it is much easier to relate to underage girls if you let them think you're underage also.






We realise this is a bit of a cheap shot. This could really be any drunk crumb in any city. We can't blank out his eyes because the look of sheer ecstasy flowin' from them as a pretty fat looking sub makes sweet love to his face is priceless. But yeah - this guy is included because our street is lined with hungry drunks like this chillin on the darkened corners every thursday night. They throw out inebriated nonsensical sexual propositions between mouthfulls. 'fuknheehlyew looklykeamoistie scoff*whereyougoin?Toogoodahhrwee?fuknbitches.yeahman*scoff*

...and that's all hot and stuff but if they aren't even going to throw in a bundy and coke at the stocky then we don't want no scrubs.

We found robert de niro's young clone hanging outside our building waiting for me when we got home. There is something about a strange guy lighting up a stogey outside your place.... We could be living in my parents mansion, getting my rent, food and electricity paid in one of the safest of cities on a far-flung and isolated british colony but lets be honest here, he really made us feel underground and urban.

Then we went upstairs, took a milk bath while smoking big fat wads of plastic australian cash and congratulated ourselves on being awesome and middle class.